Grief is sleepless nights, tossing and turning, thinking about nothing in particular and about everything to do with your lost loved one.
Grief is going through the motions of your day-chores, watching TV, eating, talking to people-with your lost love always on your mind, lurking in your heart.
Grief is feeling the loss of your lost one as deeply now as when it occurred in June last year.
Grief is retreating into your shell, because trying to play at being ‘fine’ all the time is exhausting. So is being dismissed as being ‘too emotional’ because your grief is seen by some as an inconvenience.
Grief is dealing with the things no one likes to talk about when they are alive, and being harshly reminded that the systems that exist in Nigeria-Banks, Courts, Pension Fund Administrators-will be as inefficient and frustrating in death as they are when you are alive. It’s the inexplicable Nigerian way.
Grief is laughing and crying when watching your lost love’s favourite TV show, wishing everything had just been different.
Grief is being thankful, and being grateful that your Mother had raised you and loved you the way she did, and praying constantly that she is resting in peace.
Ivie M. Eke 2021.